5. Ask for Help and Accountability
The best-case scenario is that you and your spouse revisit this conversation and then make a game plan to move forward together. If this is the case, know that we weren't meant to do this life alone. Ask for help and accountability. After all, as Christians, we're told to bear one another's burdens (Galatians 6:2).
Ideally, this would be opening up to another married couple you trust that seems to have a healthy marriage. Perhaps you know this couple well or find them by reaching out to your pastor and asking for a mentor couple.
Another element for change would be to ask if biblical counselors are in your area. This is a wonderful way to process your marriage struggles through the lens of the gospel. You can find a biblical counselor through the Association of Certified Biblical Counselors by entering your area code here.
If your spouse isn't receptive to getting outside help, pray about talking with your pastor or elders. Ask for prayer and advice on how to move forward. But don't lose hope. You can still use this time to work on yourself. You are not your spouse's Holy Spirit, and you can trust that the Lord will work in his perfect timing (Proverbs 3:5-6).
Remember that fighting for your marriage is worth every second and that asking for help is a sign of wisdom, strength, and maturity. Fighting for your marriage likely won't be easy, but God is with you, and God is for you.
If you consider yourself to be in an abusive marriage, forgiveness and reconciliation are sometimes possible. Please reach out to your pastor, elders, or a trusted friend. Ask for help. Get somewhere safe, and then explore the hope of restoring your marriage.
4 Powerful Prayers for a Troubled Marriage
12 Traits of an Abusive Relationship
10 Ways to Rebuild Trust in a Marriage on the Rocks
20 Reasons Marriages Fail (Christian Marriages, Too)
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